Project Bandaloop

 

If I was a dancer, this is whom I would be.

I caught myself wondering this morning, at 45 years old,

post three 10lb baby boys created, built, buoyed and birthed through this body,

almost one year aprés radiation sickness zapping the shit out of tonsil cancer, no bum, no boobs, no breath, no boundaries

one month pre-first-5i50-triathlon, All re:, rebuild, restore, renew, reYes to this body, all mine.

Re-mine

Re-mind

it’s mine

With the scars

I’ve shed

of loneliness, harrowing calls for a fucking hand to grasp on to, curdling sobs of nothing, never, hating to ever ask why, with an empty belly of scraps for answers, lost in existential bullshit truthshit myshit – still lost

no,

I’m not

never have been.

Always found but too poetic to call out

found in the same place I came in.

If I was a dancer, I’d do

This.

I love the muscle, the discipline, the dance.

The ache of yearning to touch the unknowable

Throwing myself wild yet held, trusted, caught.

The throb of music speaking to me through me, threw me as me. In the construct of this body, my home for endless unforgiving beauty, relentless fire of scorching purple, passion, my touch down so tender with each flex, muscled palm, arch, heel

toe, pad pad pad

and fly.

I can fucking fly.

launch wide – out out out still more out

there

curve back, looking up, tumbling every which way my body contorts in partnership with the sky.

with him.

with her.

with them.

I surrender wide, full, brazen

glorious

knowing I am held.

That’s what I would be, if I was a dancer.

Thx to Patti Jo for posting this, it completely changed my morning. I didn’t know I was writing today, but clearly, I was.

img_0047-1

 

xxT

 

 


TinaO is a writer, speaker and the founder of TinaOLife – a hub for all things worth living for, the workshop Live Your Best Story, and her coaching practice:  Tall Poppy Living. She’s also a professional network marketer with a decade in the industry and with her Tall Poppy Living for Network Marketers Coaching Program, she teaches: selling isn’t slimey and marketing isn’t make-believe. You can be yourself and be successful in Direct Sales.

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Yes Tina the First 20 Minutes do Suck

The_First_20_Minutes

I’m training for my first triathlon and when I decided to actually commit: hook line and sinker it was because the decision made me, and not the other way around. Don’t believe me?

Have you ever done something without knowing why?

  • When you tell the story about how you met your best friend, or spouse, have you ever said “I just kinda stumbled into him/her…”
  • When you’re choosing what you’re going to order off the menu, how do you land on what you really want?
  • Ever commit to something you can’t afford yet somehow make it work?
  • Have you ever been in the right place at the right time with the right people resulting in the luckiest happenstance ever?

That’s what I’m talking about.  See, when the decision makes you and you’re able to tune in to the process, as in, you are able to S L O W down enough to follow each individual impulse: listening to how your mind responds, noticing how your body reacts and then following through with a decisive action rather than just chalking it up to ‘lady luck’, that’s what decisions making you looks like.

You might call it a ‘gut’ choice. Fair enough, now we’re talking semantics yet we’re both on the same page.

That’s how saying YES to my first triathlon happened.  A good friend of mine sent me a Facebook post about Vancouver’s first Ironman branded Tri and without skipping a beat, my body said yes and opted not to block the insanity of that decision.

Today I am two months away from the damn thing and I’m in the thick of it. Training and preparing that is. I started with The Vancouver Sun Run last month, nailed it and celebrated.  Check.

2016-04-17 09.02.32

 

 

 

 

 

 

Next… 

Then with the help of the good people at Spin Cycle Bike Store, I acquired Rosebud, my first real road bike and began to train on two tires instead of two legs. This where it gets hard – and not physically difficult (well, okay, yes physically too), but really, it is more about the mental game. Why?

2016-03-19 11.07.04

 

2016-03-19 10.35.00Because hills stink and I live in a place with lots of them.  I see cyclists coming off the boat to enjoy my island home, and I think: “Oh Dude… you have no idea. This ain’t Tofino. We’re not all about tourists, offering a cute little bike path along a flat, straight-away with sweet coffee shops dotting the route”, no, that we’re most definitely not. We’re an island for cycling athletes who are super happy sweating and grunting.

That said, when I’m in the right frame of mind, I totally dig it. I have this kinda ‘I’ll show you road‘ mindset. ‘Just watch me fast cars! Take that hill number eight! I am UNSTOPPABLE!’

Unstoppable Wrist

But when I’m not in the right frame of mind. Oiiiiiiiii. It’s no fun at all. And the really frustrating thing is that I can’t seem to predict which mindset I’m going to be in when I climb on my bike.

But then I had an insight.

You see, I forgot.

The first 20 minutes of doing anything NEW usually sucks.

  • It’s awkward.
  • The body freaks out.
  • The mind goes ballistic.  The self-talk ramps up with self-doubt.

Oh yeah… that’s normal. 

The invitation for me, for you, for all of us is to stay with it, to grow stronger, to trust the process, to build the engine, to re-frame our thoughts away from doing what is easy, to doing what we feel compelled to do regardless of our skillset.

I felt drawn to say yes to doing my first triathlon only eight months out of radiation treatment from stage 3 tonsil cancer. It makes no logical sense, yet it’s the decision that made me, and it has felt dramatically ‘right’ the whole way.

Today I am in the thick of it and what I’m noticing, is that in this place, is where my reasons for saying yes begin to materialize.

When things are easy, what’s to learn other than ‘look what I can do’? When things are hard, that’s when the real learning kicks in:

  • Resilience
  • Courage
  • Tenacity
  • Depth of character
  • Physical and mental strength
  • New neuro-pathways of yes I can to replace the old ones of no I can’t
  • Knowing myself beyond whom I’ve believed myself to be

Why did I say yes to my first Triathlon? Well, I have some ideas, but the race hasn’t even happened yet and so there is so much more to come. I’ll be sure to fill you in on all I’ve learned once I cross the finish line on July 10th.

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There is gold in them there hills.

Ride ém TinaO. Ride ém. 

2016-03-30 13.25.04

 

xxT

 

 

Yes you can support me by making a pledge to CAN TOO – supporting my very first triathlon.

Yes you can support my RIDE TO CONQUER CANCER too!


TinaO is a writer, speaker and the founder of TinaOLife – a hub for all things worth living for, the workshop Live Your Best Story, and her coaching practice:  Tall Poppy Living. She’s also a professional network marketer with a decade in the industry and with her Tall Poppy Living for Network Marketers Coaching Program, she teaches: selling isn’t slimey and marketing isn’t make-believe. You can be yourself and be successful in Direct Sales.

 

 

 

 

100 LOVE

100 love square

Sending LOVE to those who have walked the path, still run against time, or are now at rest.

There is LIFE after cancer.

  • Pledging $20+ in the name of your loved one supporting:
  • Goal #1 $1000 for Can Too (Vancouver Triathlon)
  • Goal #2 $2500 for the Ride to Conquer Cancer

As a survivor, I swim, bike and run for them, because I still can. 


 

hair

I’m a cancer survivor.

Truth is, I hate that term, but it’s a story people relate to plus, it’s true.  In April 2015 I was diagnosed with stage 3 tonsil cancer, HPV p16 immunostaining. Highly cure-able, yet grueling in treatment. I was warned by my doc, my ear nose and throat doc and the oncologist about all that was coming so I was prepared. It was a disgusting process for sure (I won’t get into that now, but if you want to know more I’ll share my story here later).  In July 2015 we finished our final treatment and I’m humbled to say that we all made it, and I’m not just talking about ‘not dying’, I’m talking about, we’re all still ‘living’.  Me and my family of five, my friends of many, and my community of plenty made it through together and we’re all just that little bit more inspired to be ALIVE today, thus TinaOLife was born.

Unstoppable Wrist

This 100 Love campaign marks the beginning of my ‘cancer as life-catalyst story’ that found me.  I often say, to whom much is given, much is expected, and unfortunately, sometimes what we’re given isn’t always the ‘good’ stuff.

I was given a lot:

To welcome fear to the table, to acknowledge disease as a guest, to choke down the very humanness of treatment, stare into the eyes of helplessness from those who love you the most, choosing to show up in action-yet surrendering to the process, to question: why me? To feel guilty, experiencing survivor remorse as one who seems to have side-stepped the destruction, and to carry on as a survivor (I still feel like I don’t deserve to say that), and knowing that I am so much more than the survivor label because I can still DO something.

on the bed

 

 

So now I am giving back.  

I’m 8 months out of treatment with an ‘all-clear’ petscan, everything presenting that we got it all and a stellar prognosis on the horizon, and so today I am choosing to celebrate this awesome body of mine that came back from being broken to celebrate what it can do PLUS pay it forward.

Today I am honouring those who have come before me: your family members, your friends, and your loved ones who have walked this cancer path, those who continue to race against time with their care providers and specialists doing their utmost to keep them alive, and those who are now at rest.  This is a pledge page.  This summer I will SWIM, BIKE AND RUN in their honour, and I’m asking you: Whose names can I carry with me? as I train for two big physical events that promise to push my physical and psychological limits.  I’m alive and I am celebrating that.

TinaOSoul nose crinkle

Here’s how it works:

No pledge is too small, and every $20 (Can Too) / $25 (Ride to Conquer Cancer) pledge with an honouree attached will be celebrated during each event and after. I will run, ride and swim in their name. 

You can choose which event you would like to pledge:


 

EVENT #1 The Vancouver 5i50 Ironman Triathlon July 10th. It’s an olympic distance tri.  Oh boy… I can thank my dear friend Adrian5150 for this one.

It’s a 1.5km swim, 40km bike and finishing off with a 10km run.

p.s. the first time I swam with my face in the water I was 28yrs old and I haven’t done it since… I’m 45 yrs old now.  This is my biggest challenge.  

I am raising $1000 under the Can Too banner  an organization that raises funds for cancer research in exchange for a triathlon training program and volunteer coaches to help me along the way. Haven’t heard about Can Too yet? Well, that’s because they’re not technically in Canada yet, (though cross your fingers for the future okay?) however, I can still work with them from a distance.

Can Too RegistrationsCan Too is an Australian organization that engages and inspires individuals to achieve personal health, well-being and altruistic goals. Beginners and experienced athletes alike are given professional coaching as part of a team to run, ride or swim in endurance events- including 10km, half-marathon and marathon runs, ocean swims and triathlons.

All pledges raised go towards innovation in the prevention, care and control of cancer through Cure Cancer Australia and Cancer Council NSW.

I SUPPORT CAN TOO

CLICK HERE (or the pic) to pledge $20 or higher in the name of your loved one as I complete the Vancouver 5i50 Triathlon.

Today I run, I ride, I swim and I celebrate what this body can do, for me, and for you.

Why?  Because I can, and that’s worth sweating for.

 


EVENT #2  The Ride to Conquer Cancer August 27/28th

The Ride to Conquer Cancer benefiting the BC Cancer Foundation is an epic, two-day cycling event spanning over 200 kilometres through picturesque scenery! Their vision is clear – A World Free From Cancer.

ride to conquer

 

With some highschool (Patrick Phang) and elementary school friends (David Tam) behind me (yes, it’s true), I’ve decided to cycle 200km over two days.  Thanks to Spin Cycle Bike Store in Gibsons on the Sunshine Coast, I have a new LIV bike to the ride too. They rock and I’m thrilled to have them on my ‘tri’ and ‘ride’ team.  Whewwwwf! 

Doing this ride post cancer treatment myself, I get to reclaim the cyclist in me who used to love the freedom of cycling before having children. Once again I’ll feel the strength in my legs and feel the wind in my hair.  I’m soooooo looking forward to this ride!

spin cycle

The money you pledge for The Ride to Conquer Cancer will benefit BC Cancer Foundation and support leading clinicians, scientists, and researchers whose search for new discoveries and improved patient outcomes will have a real impact in our communities throughout the province, across Canada, and around the world.

ride to conquer SUPPORT

 

Each week I will update our list of honourees. Please know that once you PLEDGE to either cause, I will followup with an email to you confirming the name of your loved one and if you’d like to send me a photo, I’ll use that too in my 100 person square that will look something like this only with 100 faces:

100 love example

Today, this is where it all begins. I have just three names on my list so far and I wish it could stay that way because that would mean we’ve found the solution.  For now, we begin where we are and we move forward from here.

Here’s to the people you love.

and here’s to you for making a difference.

xxT


100 love

 

 

 

FOR TODAY, MARCH 23rd, I train for:

  1. My mom, Peggy Overbury
  2. My dad, Norman Overbury (while not cancer, emphyzema instead, he died from years of smoking and I have no doubt that cancer would’ve come quickly).
  3. and My mother in law, Barb Ingram

TinaOLife

xxT

 

 


Make your pledge to CAN TOO – supporting my very first triathlon by clicking here.

Make your pledge to the RIDE TO CONQUER CANCER – supporting my August ride by clicking here.

Want to join the team?  Run? Bike? Swim? with me?  Send me a message here and we’ll connect okay?