Blog – Myth you are made for

Calling up the myth you are made for

Over a year ago a group of us gathered at UBlossom retreats as facilitators of various workshops: breath, story, creative journaling, social media and more.

In the gathering lodge on Saturday night one of us stretched out across the floor and starting rolling.

Another one of us groaned and followed and pretty soon there were five of us rolling across the floor giggling and breathing and letting the weight of our body melt into the board beneath us, massaging our spine and out shoulders.

When we sat up we landed deep into a diverse conversation about our understanding of God. And let me tell you, it was a broad swath of a story.

One person is a Jesus follower, another Stardust, another Story, another Creator, and still another, the Universe. And there we were talking about our businesses, our revenue streams, our goals and manifestations and our relationships, all through the lens of our very unique interpretations and experiences of God.

Might I mention, we ate cheesies, drank wine and pulled chocolate out of our pockets.

At the next retreat, it happened again, except this time in a cabin by the fire talking about patriarchy, what is personal power, how to read scripture, poetry, what is prayer, and kegals (yes – the vaginal floor kind). Again, with so much laughter and depth in all the same moments.

And tears. I was just going through a break-up and my heart felt like it had been ripped out of my chest.

Since then we’ve been gathering in a private online group to support each other, to pray into each other, share entrepreneurial clarity, and to reflect about our energetic hits on certain decisions we’ve made. We’re a circle.

And this year we’ve decided to meet on purpose as a wisdom circle for each other.

We met this weekend at my little cabin by the sea. Out of the weekend came a message for me: ‘Calling up the Myth you are Made For’.

It was un-mistakeable like a direction, so that is what I will continue to do…

…Only this year – it has become the focus of my impact.

In times of great global change, it’s who we are at the core of our making which is called upon.

All of our painful and exquisite experiences has made us.

It’s part of the myth of us.

Imagine if you lived your life in the grit and greatness of your myth. What then? 


Tina Overbury is a core-communications specialist who works with individuals and organizations who feel called. She is a storyteller, performer, and a professional listener who works with narrative and story structure as a vehicle for human connection. Her work is rooted in Myth, Mysticism, and the practice of personal faith. She brings thirty years of collaborative storytelling in theatre, film, marketing, team based selling, and workshop facilitation. She is the founder of Live Your Best Story, a weekend retreat of deep listening held on Bowen Island, BC, Canada and is the voice and story behind TinaOLife, home to Story Stones, TinaO’s weekly online gathering of listening in to sacred stories. Tina is a proud associate of PowHERhouse media where she listens and supports the ‘stories’ of whole and integrated leaders of tomorrow. 

If you would like to know more about Tina’s approach to story, click here

VIDEO – Story Stones 1 – Blessing

TRANSCRIPTION of Story Stones 1 – Blessing

Welcome to Story Stones, an hour of deep listening and learning together.

I am a storyteller, a listener, and a holder of spaces where we can connect with the Story of Us.

My work is rooted in Myth, Mysticism, and the Christian Tradition.

I’m an artist, a writer, a mom, a runner, and a poet. My faith is in the space between us where two or more are gathered, my trust is in the mystery and my practice is listening and communicating from there. 

That’s me. 

Okay… so how does this hour work?

There will be some readings, some sacred text and scripture, and poetry.

These are the pieces I’ve been praying into all week and have then crafted a message of sorts from. There will also be moments where I invite you into deep listening between you and your understanding of what I call God, or you might call the Divine, or maybe even your guidance or inner wisdom.

In some practices this is prayer or meditation, but I call it deep listening.
Let’s settle in.

GRATITUDE CANDLE

I light a gratitude story candle to remind us no matter where we are, or what the story is inside our heads, or the story we are currently living, we are never alone. The mystery of our being and how we are held in this space and time, is always with us. We are LOVED. The mystery of us is always with us.

INVITATION TO LISTEN

This is time you’ve carved out to be with you, to be with your understanding of the sacred, to be with God and the Mystery of us. Take a breath. Take a minute to drop in, close your eyes and just get here. 
Let the story of your morning go. It is not of this moment. Let the story of what you think this is going to be go, it is not of this moment. Let yourself be. 

Listen beyond the words in your head. Open up to listening to the space itself. 

MUSIC

I invite you to listen to the words of Kyle Church: SLOW DOWN on Spotify. 

The story stone we are listening into today is the word: BLESSING and BLESSED. What does it mean to be blessed? Or when we say: that’s such a blessing. What does that even mean? And how do we live that?  This is the word we are listening into today. 

FOR THE KIDS

Let’s start with something really easy, something kids might understand: 

This comes from Shel Silverstein’s book: Where the Sidewalk Ends

Shel Silverstein (September 25, 1930 – May 10, 1999) was an American writer known for his cartoons, songs, and children’s books. I grew up having them read to me and I have read them to my boys. 

By playing what we’ve got…

KIDS  READING 

Hmmm…. boredom, imagination, making something out of nothing. Because the nothing is the blessing.

LISTEN

Let us LISTEN

I invite you to close your eyes and listen in to the phrase of ‘what is the nothing you feel blessed by? What does your NOTHING want to say to you today? 

Breathe and be.

Be and Breathe.

Let the story of blessed by no-thing be with you. 

What do you hear?

We’re going to move into three readings,

One from the Bible, from Matthew 5, and Psalm 15 and another from a Rumi poem. 

MATTHEW  5 1:12

You’re Blessed

5 1-2 When Jesus saw his ministry drawing huge crowds, he climbed a hillside. Those who were apprenticed to him, the committed, climbed with him. Arriving at a quiet place, he sat down and taught his climbing companions. This is what he said:

3 “You’re blessed when you’re at the end of your rope. With less of you there is more of God and his rule.

4 “You’re blessed when you feel you’ve lost what is most dear to you. Only then can you be embraced by the One most dear to you.

5 “You’re blessed when you’re content with just who you are—no more, no less. That’s the moment you find yourselves proud owners of everything that can’t be bought.

6 “You’re blessed when you’ve worked up a good appetite for God. He’s food and drink in the best meal you’ll ever eat.

7 “You’re blessed when you care. At the moment of being ‘care-full,’ you find yourselves cared for.

8 “You’re blessed when you get your inside world—your mind and heart—put right. Then you can see God in the outside world.

9 “You’re blessed when you can show people how to cooperate instead of compete or fight. That’s when you discover who you really are, and your place in God’s family.

10 “You’re blessed when your commitment to God provokes persecution. The persecution drives you even deeper into God’s kingdom.

11-12 “Not only that—count yourselves blessed every time people put you down or throw you out or speak lies about you to discredit me. What it means is that the truth is too close for comfort and they are uncomfortable. You can be glad when that happens—give a cheer, even!—for though they don’t like it, I do! And all heaven applauds. And know that you are in good company. My prophets and witnesses have always gotten into this kind of trouble.

I love that… My prophets and witnesses have always  gotten into this kind of trouble. 

Take a moment to notice what is still with you?

What is speaking to you? What do you hear?

LISTEN.

Psalm 15

God, who gets invited

    to dinner at your place?

How do we get on your guest list?

“Walk straight,

    act right,

        tell the truth.

“Don’t hurt your friend,

    don’t blame your neighbor;

        despise the despicable.

“Keep your word even when it costs you,

    make an honest living,

        never take a bribe.

“You’ll never get

blacklisted

if you live like this.”

SERMON

Creator…. God…. Universe… Mystery…
I acknowledge the story of us that was here before we got here and the story that of us that will be here long after we’re gone. May the words of my mouth hold your hearts well and be in service to the unfolding of the story of us all.  

“You’ll never get blacklisted when you live like this”. Have you ever felt like that? Like you must be on the ‘naughty’ list. If you’ve seen Elf over the holidays you’re already laughing. But how about blacklisted? As in, the red rope of entry is closed to you, or worse, you feel like you are on the list of bad, doomed even. Or maybe you feel like you must be a target, as in a magnet for awful things. 

Have you ever felt like that? 

If you’re fortunate, you haven’t. Or maybe you’re lucky and this experience hasn’t happened to you. Maybe you’re one of the rare ones and you have no scars. But I doubt it. Because we are all blessed. 

And that’s the WORD we are listening into today:  BLESSED.  

You will notice everything I do, every story I tell, every place I invite us into, I bring what I call the double edge sword of story to it. I am most interested  in the wholeness of story, because it is where the wisdom lives. There is no wisdom in what we might call light only.

There is light…  sure! Totally! Awesome!  I Love it.  I just posted on Facebook…  Dear God… can the rain please stop?   I’ve had a few dark days this month and the rain and dreariness is kicking my ass. I love light.
But the wisdom of story doesn’t happen on one side of the sword. It happens on all three. Yes three sides.

What we might call light

What we might call dark

And then the edge between. 

In  Story listening, our invitation is to listen from the edge, so integration can happen.  

We can’t hear integration. 

We can’t hear transformative steps in a puzzle already done.  

We hear in the individual  pieces.

And today’s piece, or Story Stone is the stone of blessed.  We are blessed.

So let’s jump into this notion I just threw at you about being blacklisted, or on the naughty list, or the experience that we might be bad or something.

From Matthew we hear:  

10 “You’re blessed when your commitment to God provokes persecution. The persecution drives you even deeper into God’s kingdom.

Okay, before we go any further, since this is my first story stones episode, let’s deal with the God issue. For  those of you who balk at the word God – I get it. A lot has been done in the name of God that hurts. A lot has been done in the name of God that can’t be undone.  

Remember though: in the name of God, not as God. But then many of you don’t believe in God. Cool. I get that too. 

I don’t know who I believe in, as in holding a pronoun he, she, or they. I don’t have some big image of a person or celestial being called God in my head.

I  don’t know what I believe in, as in holding a static picture like: wind, or energy, or the ocean. I can’t say for sure what God is.

God is a mystery.

And the mystery happens in the space between us, when we connect, when we have opened our hearts a little, when we are shields down, and in that space, an experience of God or spirit as a ‘carrier’ of God happens.

Have you ever heard:  ‘where two or more are gathered…’ – That’s what I’m talking about. 

You might say then, that what I believe in for sure for sure for sure is experiences of God – because it’s happened to all of us. That deep look into someone’s eyes and there’s an unmistakable – otherworldly connection. Those moments when you’re  with someone and all the hairs on the back of your neck go up. Or those moments when you’re with nature and the beauty of the place takes your breath away, or as my dear friend Jillian Rutledge (a breath coach) says, when you are awestruck.

To me… those are the universal experiences of God. We  know exactly what they are when we have them. As to who or what is God? That’s not for me to say for you. But I believe in it. In the great unknown and the love we find in those places. So when I say God, for those of  you who are carrying pain from that word, or cognitive reasoning disbelief with that word, please hear an acronym of God as the ‘Good Ole I  Dunno” – because nobody does.   

And that’s the point. 

I think that’s the most beautiful invitation of all. To experience God and not be able to describe it. And I am devoted to that.

So back to the scripture from MATTHEW where we heard ‘You’re blessed when your commitment to God provokes persecution’. 

In a literal sense, that sounds awful. Commitment to God provokes  persecution… yikes.  Right…  kinda like marriage to some: til death do us part… you mean, I gotta die to get out of this one?

But that’s not what I hear.  I don’t hear ball and chain marriage. I don’t hear die for my faith. I don’t hear suffering for enlightenment. Or the suffering of enlightenment. I hear freedom. 

I’ve had a few dark days in my life as I know you have too. In those dark moments, when my belief in all the big things crash like:

Love and being loved: I don’t believe in anything. I am empty. I can actually convince myself that I am never going to be loved by anyone ever….

Abundance and having enough: I am convinced I will struggle forever.

God itself and being supported: I am thoroughly convinced, like I know, I am all alone here, and no one but me will get me through this… 

Or even my very existence, and mattering at all. In those times I hear in my head I was a mistake.  

Yup. I’m normal like that. I have pain too. Do you ever spiral away like that?

I do – still. Sometimes a lot. 

It usually happens when I’ve been side-swiped by a life-experience, or I’ve had a series of bad happenings occur in a row. A person can doubt herself, or slide into a mental health spiral, or worse, ride a big wave of depression. None of us are beyond that happens. It’s one of the signs we are human.

However, in those moments, as I’m positive you have had them too – we are experiencing life as we step away from God. We are forgetting the God moments of our life. 

We are empty.

We are feeling persecuted.

And what is the only way out of those things? 

All the woo woo books say the same thing. It’s not just the bible or the koran or the Buddhist Sutras or Yoga… They all say the same thing: surrender, or lay it down, or accept, or let it go.

When we lay it down, or in my story language, honour the story of the pain and the persecution, we come closer to God, because the next step, if we’ve truly laid it down and reminded ourselves: we are not the pain we are feeling, and we are . not the persecution which is happening… The next thing that happens is we rest. We have our tears, we empty our buckets and in that empty place, we rest in being blessed that we can… rest.

And we can. 

The container for that rest, for the emptying for those tears is the blessing . of God. Or the Good Ole I Dunno. The Mystery.

We are blessed. 

PRACTICE

In the moments of my greatest pain, where I am up against my deepest scarring of beliefs which are not true but feel true, I have a practice of sentences I say to myself to help me remember I am blessed. Saying them helps me rewire the circuits in my brain for those moments. 

It sounds like this: 

I won’t give  up my ___________

to ____________

because I already ___________.

For example: 

Love – as a  single person who experiences stretches of loneliness, and experiences of bad choices, and yes, rejection, I can be faced with the unloveable monster, and can experience what I call clutchy… you might call it desperate… weak… or needy…

These are also very  very very very human feels, so no judgement here. And I know when I’m in this place, I forget I am blessed, and I’m at risk of doing anything or trading something to have what might be love, but probably isn’t… You know what I’m talking about. 

So this is the phrase I use (following the example above), and I whisper it to myself over and over and over again to calm myself. 

I wont give up my SELF

to feel LOVED

because the truth is I am LOVED

(or BLESSED)

Let’s try FAITH:

This is one I used just recently, and it was really, really challenging, but nourished me and brought me closer to my understanding of God:

I  won’t give up my FAITH

to belong,

because the truth is, I already belong. 

(I am BLESSED)

How about ABUNDANCE:

And to understand this one, many a time I’ve been in a crossroads between the safety of a job, and my integrity as a child of God, and a follower of Mystery. Each of these crossroads were turning points, and catalysts of destruction and rebirth. Here are three examples:

Once upon a time my mom said to me in answer to a crumbling marriage and an impending financial disaster coming: Christina… you just need to get a job.

I remember thinking: You must not understand me.

Another time I was in a leadership tussle within an organization so I asked for guidance from a senior leader and her answer was: Tina… just do what you’re told.

I remember thinking: You must not have heard me.

And recently I was in a job I felt called to and I heard: Tina…you don’t know what you don’t know and you just can’t do that.

And I remember thinking: I’m not motivated by rules, you must not know me.
Which lead to: I love you enough to leave.

This is what I say to myself when I feel myself lean sideways, off my path, off my call, away from my knowing of being blessed.

I won’t give up my calling

to feel safe,

because the truth is, in this moment, I am safe. 

What I offer to you is to hold the understanding you are already blessed, and you can rest in that. Craft a guiding sentence which takes the persecution you are experiencing, and the sacredness you are holding within you, and cushion it with the blessing of knowing what is really true. 

I won’t give up my SELF/FAITH/SAFETY to BELONG/FEEL WANTED/FEEL SAFE – Because the truth is…. I already…. (insert the blessing of truth)

Okay… so you heard my big three ‘curses’ I tell myself sometimes. These are the three that take me out at the knees… What are yours? What takes you out? What takes you to your knees?

You know what I love about that image? It’s the universal  body position of surrender, and the invitation for prayer, or sacred time with your connection to God.

Where we lay it down.

At the end of Psalm 15  we hear:

“Keep your word even when it costs you,

    make an honest living,

        never take a bribe.

“You’ll never get

blacklisted”

Never take a bribe. That is worth repeating.

Or we go back to the words of Shel Silverstein:

And though there may be orchestras

That sound a little better

With their fancy shiny instruments

That cost an awful lot-

Hey we’re making music twice as good

By playing what we’ve got

Hold on to your sovereignty

Hold on to the blessing of you

To remember you are blessed and you’ll never get blacklisted. 

And then what happens…?

Well, now we can bring Rumi into this beautiful conversation… 

LISTEN: 

Don’t hide

The site of your face

Is a blessing

Wherever you place your foot

There rests a blessing

Look,

Every falling leaf is a blessing.

All  of nature swings in unison

Singing without tongues

Listening without ears

What a Blessing.

O Soul

The four elements are your face

Water, wind, fire, and earth

Each one is a blessing

Once the seed of faith takes root,

It cannot be blown away

Even by the strongest wind

Now that’s a blessing.

I bow to you

For  the dust of your feet

Is the crown on my head

And as I walk towards you

Every step I take is a blessing

-Rumi

Okay… so now you remember you are blessed, and you can source yourself back to that… but what about the big stuff? – right? 

You know what I’m talking about… Fires in Australia, Koalas and Kangaroos and other soft padded foot animals burning in the heat. The divisiveness on our planet right now. The fighting we saw in China this year. The innocent people, doctors who couldn’t get to student activists bleeding. The shootings in classrooms of our children. Violence, and I haven’t even begun to talk about disease. We probably don’t need to go there. We have all been touched by cancer already. Someone we know and love has struggled through it, or been claimed by it. Why? 

We’ll never truly know. 

We are not God.

We are not the Universe.

We are not the intelligence of the cosmos in this one breath, body and brain. 

We are not.  Some might disagree with me.  

So here is what I will suggest:

When we remember, truly remember and practice feeling, knowing, and choosing the understanding that we are blessed, we are developing a practice of treasuring.

And what we treasure we lovingly protect, we don’t put in harm’s way.

What we treasure we honour.

When we are in the act of treasuring, we make different choices.

The fires may still burn, but they wouldn’t be happening by the hands of us, and there wouldn’t be a global climate change due to us. 

We wouldn’t be fighting as much.  We would protect our values and beliefs differently. We would honour them, and treasure them, and in doing so, we might…. just might…. Be able to see that the person we are talking to across from us is just trying to treasure their stuff too.

Oh mannnnn it’s not like we don’t know this stuff. 

Love thy neighbour as you love yourself.

Treasure yourself, and remember they are treasuring themself too.

Remember you are blessed.

They are blessed.

This world is a blessing

And treasure it.

We are treasure.

We are gold.

We are love, belonging, and abundance, and enough, and worthy, and chosen, and and and and and… we ARE. 

We are that treasure.

We are that treasured, by God.

The Good Ole I  Dunno.

We come in that way, and we go out that way. 

We can count our blessings and begin to live as if we are them and are blessed by them: 

From Irving Berlin we hear: 

When I’m worried and I can’t sleep

I count my blessings instead of sheep

And I fall asleep counting my blessings

Now Rosemary Clooney I am not,

Yet, I am blessed just the same.  

And may it be so…

MUSIC:

I invite you to listen to the message of Irving Berlin and the gift of love that is the voice of Diana Krall as she sings: COUNT YOUR BLESSING, on Spotify. 
COUNTING YOUR BLESSING.

BENEDICTION

As you close your time with the sacred, I invite you to remember that you are loved by the mystery. You are held by the mystery. You are known by the mystery.

Let no mystery confound you into the conclusion, that mystery cannot be yours.*

Thank you for listening…

xxT

*a quote from Mark Helprin’s book: Soldier of the Great War

This is TinaO’s Ministry of Story. She is a sacred-listener in a divisive time, cultivating safe containers for real change-based connecting and conversation. She is a Storyteller rooted in Myth, Mysticism and the Christian Tradition. To Tina, communication is a spiritual practice of listening and following the living story of us.

Her faith is in the space between us, where two or more are gathered, her trust is in the Mystery and her practice is listening and communicating from there. 

If you would like to receive her weekly Story Stones Sessions in your inbox, click here to have it sent to you.

 


Shaman Time – BLOG

shaman-time

 

I was with a client last week and he said to me: We’re in Shaman time. I said What? He says that’s when we bend time, when it could be 3pm or 3am, when the construct of a ticking clock drops away and so does our relationship to it.

Oh, I said.

That’s what listening feels like to me. That’s how I know when I’m in it instead of doing it.

I’m a core story specialist, at least that’s what I put on my business card so people can ‘get’ it, but really, if I lived in a small village where we were named by what we do as the integration of who we are, people would call me: Story Tracker. That makes me chuckle. We’re just so weird aren’t we? I’ll own that. I’m weird. Damn weird. Perfect weird. I can see me as a character in a film: I’m a little bit witchy, probably old and wrinkled and the director has probably given me only one eye to accentuate my story scars. I’d have a long crooked stick that I poke at you as your story unfolds in front of us… Relax, I have two eyes and I don’t carry a stick, though I might be a bit witchy… One could make a case.

Life would be a lot easier if we didn’t feel the need to separate who we are from what we do because they really are one in the same. Well, that is, when we’re doing what we innately are, thus all the book stores bursting at the seams with volumes about how to achieve being, as if being has a goal post attached to it. 

It’s not about doing nothing in order to be, it’s about being so that our doing feels like nothing, or as my client calls it: Shaman Time. 

At some point in a Story Day with me we usually end up out at the wildest part of the island where I live because there the wind howls, the waves crash and the trees bend and grow sideways.  I take people there because it’s the closest I can come to being in Tofino without actually having to make the trek to get there myself. My brood of a family have camped on the wild wet west coast every summer for the last fifteen years, and it’s where I go to feel small, witnessed. My favourite time of the day is just as the sun is setting when there’s a loud heaviness of silence sitting above those of us standing on the beach. I can feel my own story being tracked, but this time not by me.

When I’m walking with my clients, I ask them about the word Mystery.  What makes a good one? I ask.

They say: It’s thrilling, it’s kinda scary, it’s unknown, it’s a story; until I ask: What makes it NOT a horror? Not a cliff hanger? And how come we feel compelled to watch or read them all the way to the end?

Because we want to know what happens, they say. Like duhhhhh… they implore, respectfully looking at me as if I missed something.

Why? I ask.

Because we know that it will end, it will resolve and when it does, it makes sense.

Right, I add. Right.

Then I make a joke about being a kid and watching Scooby Doo and how my favourite part was always when the unmasked villain says: “and I would’ve gotten away with it too if it hadn’t been for you meddling kids.”

Don’t we all feel like that sometimes?

The quote that has run my adult life comes from Mark Helprin’s novel, Soldier of the Great War about Alessandro Giuliani, an aged World War 1 Vet who goes on a pilgrimage and befriends a young boy on the way. As the two of them walk for days together, he recounts his life asking again and again in multiples of ways: Why did they die and I live? Why did my life matter? In the randomness of pain and beauty, where is the purpose of my choices? of my life? and the quote from his book that I have had pinned to my wall for years which has become the message that is now my life’s work is:

“Let no mystery confound you into the conclusion, that mystery cannot be yours”.

Mystery.

Witness.

Story.

Time.

See, time turns into mist and then disappears when I’m listening to people because that’s how mystery, like home, shows up for me, and in that space of witnessing it’s as if God reaches in through our story and says Yes.

And we both can hear it.

 

lybs-november-25th

November 25th – 27th on Bowen Island, BC Canada (20 minutes outside of Vancouver) at Xenia Retreat Centre, TinaO is hosting Live Your Best Story, a weekend about Listening to your story so as to Lead your life.

If you’d like to talk to TinaO to find out if this weekend retreat is a good fit for you, send her a message below or at tina@liveyourbeststory.com to book a complimentary core story phone session.  Living Your Best Story is a weekend designed just for you. It’s gentle. It’s honouring. It’s introspective and it feels like coming home.

 


TinaO Living Story

xxT

TinaO is a Core Story Specialist, a writer, speaker and the founder of TinaOLife – a hub for all things worth living for, and the workshop Live Your Best Story. She’s also a professional network marketer with a decade in the industry and  she teaches: selling isn’t slimey and marketing isn’t make-believe. You can be yourself and be successful in Direct Sales.