Why I Love Jake Hassel-Gren a TinaO List to Love – BLOG

We make some people harder to love because they defy our societal and cultural norms. They’re pure. They don’t mince expectations with filtered down possibilities so everyone else is comfortable. They don’t stop to give you their spot in the sun because they know we all have one.  They think: Why create shade when there’s enough heat for all?

That’s Jake.

She’s highly misunderstood, and it’s precisely what I love about her. What you see is who she is and what she wants for you is everything.  Tricky to believe these days: someone who actually wants the best for you because she understands what it is.

And therein lies the rub.

Her standards are high.

She comes by it honestly. She was raised that way (but that’s next week’s story). Here’s a glimpse though. I can’t help myself.

“My parents are truly incredible human beings. They exposed me to life across it’s multiple landscapes. I had it all. During the week, life in a fine home with velvet curtains and stunning design and then weekends running barefoot in the grass with scads of artists and hippies. There  was no room for judgement in my life, only experiences. My parents gave us and showed us what the best truly is: a full and confident life.”

No wonder I liked her immediately even though I wasn’t sure I should.  She challenged me right from the get-go.  There was no nicey-nicey dumbing it down small-talk. She asked what I did. I told her I’m a Core Story Specialist. I help people articulate exactly who they are and intrinsically, why they do what they do.

And she got it.

“Cool”, she said.  And that was it.

I liked that.

She didn’t offer any polite ‘filler’ conversation. She just moved on to what was next.

What you see is who she is and what she wants for you is everything.

I’ll come completely clean on this one, we work together now and I offered to write this article because I feel lucky to know her. Holy Hannah and mutha of all that is F-bomb sacred, Jake Hassel-Gren has a MASSIVE VISION for female entrepreneurs. She (and I) can drop more F-bombs than a bus load of 14 year olds on Dorritos. The difference is kids do it ’cause they can, and she does it ’cause sometimes it’s called for.  Some moments deserve a capital F in the front with a big ole K at the back.

The truth is though, as much as I send her up now, I completely couldn’t figure her out when we first met.  “I’ll connect you with my friend Jake”, said Charlene SanJenko of PowHERhouse Women’s Media Group to me last August. “She’s the woman behind The LEAP Learning Lab. You two can talk about building a program to help women bring their book from concept to publish-ready.  Jake is as tired as you and I are of seeing women continue to work in silos. We have to change how we do things and Jake’s LEAP Learning Lab is all about that.”

Where does she live? I asked.

“Toronto”, said Charlene.

Oh gawd I thought, not another perfectly coiffed Toronto woman to snicker at my hippy hair and make snide comments about my closet full of Crocs.  Sure… let’s talk. I thought. We’ll see. 

We got on a video chat in September and in perfect post summer form, I had sun-fried frizzy hippy hair and was still bumbling around with beach brain struggling to finish complete thoughts and sentences as we shared big ideas about what would make the lives of female entrepreneur’s easier AND more powHERful.  Jake, once upon a time a VP in the banking world, now an entrepreneur on a mission to create a global, world class online Community of Practice for women and set a platinum standard for online learning, showed up exactly as she is: stunning, primed and ready for anything.

I’m going to write another piece about Jake next week. This is just the beginning.  It’s going to take a lot more than one article to capture this woman’s story. I spent a few hours on the phone with her doing what I do best, which is pulling together who she is at the Core so I can understand why she cares so deeply about women taking their spot, as she calls it.

For today though, my focus is on WHY Jake rather than WHO is Jake. I want you to know why I decided to hitch my online learning wagon to LEAP, and you know me, my reasons always have less to do with business and everything to do with the person.  A long time ago, in an entrepreneurial class I took in my early twenties, the teacher at the front of the room said “never do business with someone you wouldn’t have over for dinner”.  That truth has stayed with me.  So here’s a bit about Jake and why I think she’s pretty dang spectacular.

TinaO’s Top Ten Reasons Why I Love Jake Hassel-Gren.

Do women even say that about women anymore? I do.

#1 – She’s wicked, and every other totally awesome and righteous word I used in the 80’s. Remember how the 80’s defied logic? There was only one direction, and it was UP.  That’s how it feels to work beside Jake. We’re going somewhere and it’s gonna be florescent green, Madonna awesome.

#2 – She likes dogs. Seriously, her dogs have matching winter jackets and she’d never treat them like an accessory though they will look fantastic.  She’s a ‘small dog’ parent and yes she does post funny dog videos on Facebook.

#3 – She speaks artist. Okay, I’m stretching the truth a little (maybe a lot). She doesn’t actually SPEAK artist, but she FEELS artist which is harder and far more vulnerable to do.  I couldn’t hang with this chick if we didn’t connect in this way.

#4 – She wears red lipstick like it’s a signature. Red is primary. It isn’t made from something else by anything else. Perfect.

BTW, it’s Chanel. I asked.

#5 – She can flip you the bird while screaming your praises. Expression is like that. It’s a full contact sport. Jake does life out loud and what she doesn’t say with her words, she’ll tell you with her eyes.

#6 – It took less than 3 seconds for my phone to ring when I told her about my sister passing. Not a text. She phoned. Who calls anyone anymore? Jake.

#7 – She asks “How are you?” at least twice a week. In her world of ‘best’, of ‘do’, of ‘be’ she still finds the time to connect with those she cares about. She says things like “I was thinking about you today. How did your doctor’s appointment go?”, or “How are you holding up?”, and “Do you need anything?”.  Again, I ask you, how many people do you have in your life who do that regularly?

#8 – She calls me out on my greatness and I’m not talkin’ blowing sunshine up my butt. It’s not about compliments, it’s about saying what is so. She’s the first to say “You know that. You do that. You are that.” – When she says it, I believe it. When I say it, I talk myself out of it. I’d rather listen to her.

#9 – She loves football. Okay, so I grew up with too many brothers and I can’t stand watching sports on tv or in an arena, but I frickin’ love that she’s over-the-top, beyond-all-understanding, geeked-out C R A Z Y about The New England Patriots. I gotta respect that kinda passion you know?

#10 – When I asked her what is ‘home’ for her, and what is her greatest medicine? She said LOVE. 

Jake is a big game of life player.  She gets up every morning and asks: How can I be of service today? Some of us are harder to understand because our whole package doesn’t match the stories set up and made-up by others on the outside. Jake is like that.

I thought she was tough. She is.

I thought she was an uncompromising high achiever. She is.

I thought she was opinionated, driven and sharp. She is that too.

I thought she cared about success. She does.

Yours.

and Hers.

and Mine.

Because in Jake’s world, you don’t have to step into the shade to give someone else a piece of the sun.

The best is meant for all of us, and a woman need only stand and claim her spot to know that for herself.

This is PART ONE of TinaO’s Exclusive on Jake Hassel-Gren. Watch for Jake’s Core Story in PART TWO coming out next week. For more about Jake’s LEAP Learning Lab, you can visit her site. 

TinaO is a Core Story Specialist and a Program Director of PUBLISH with Meribeth Deen for The LEAP Learning Lab. She’s a writer, speaker and the founder of TinaOLife – a hub to Live, Give and Be Your Story, plus the deep listening weekend retreat Live Your Best Story. She’s been in the PR and Marketing world since she could put words together and has been a professional network marketer for over twelve years. She teaches: selling isn’t slimey, marketing isn’t make-believe and writing won’t give you an aneurysm (it’s not hard). You can be yourself in all that you do. In fact, that’s what the world is waiting for. 

The Skin We’re In – International Women’s Day


The Skin We're In

Never did I ever think that blogging would lead me to this.  Never did I imagine that I would ever share an image of my very own post baby ‘belly purse’, forever dimpled and dripping lightly, just over my waist band.

It’s not to be confused with a muffin top – though that would be much cuter don’t you think?

It’s not to be mistaken for flabby abs either – though that would be an inviting challenge if they were.

And it’s certainly not to be represented as a flagrant invitation to judge, advise or congratulate me on my extra bits either.

I didn’t write this post to take a stand, no, I wrote it in solidarity from one women (me) to another woman, the truly courageous Gillian Goerzen for the stand that SHE took and her call to action for all of us women who judge our own bodies.

This is what I woke up to this morning as I was coming through my 5:30am fog, making my hubby’s lunch, putting the kettle on for coffee (we like a french press – no drip for us), tossing the first load of laundry in while listening for the pop of his breakfast bagel in the toaster.  How could I not respond after seeing this in my Facebook feed?

Gillian Goerzen

OMG I thought… That’s what I look like when I plank.  I thought it was only me. Only I have the belly purse.  Only I didn’t lose the extra flabby bits after my three babies.  Only I carry this dimply baggage around with me every day, never to be left at the door.

But no.  I’m NOT the only one.  It’s just that no one talks about it and heavens to Betsy – definitely, nobody, as in nobody shows it. Thank you Gillian… Here is her post that encouraged me to do the same.   Gillian headshot

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Gillian Goerzen – Yesterday, I had an opportunity to share my story with a crowd of over 100 women for International Women’s Day. One of the images I shared was this one. You might wonder – why would you share this?

I first shared this image in one of my private fitness and nutritional accountability groups. After losing 70 lbs and having two beautiful boys, this is what my stomach looks like in a plank.  And it is the area of my body I’m still quite uncomfortable with. But I shouldn’t be! My stomach is a beautiful thing – it’s a badge of honour. It grew and made room for two beautiful boys. 

I shared it with my group to start a conversation. Because this “flaw” I see – represents a tendency of our society – especially women – to focus on what we DON’T like. It represents everything about the image of the fitness and diet industry that I believe holds us back from truly having a healthy relationship with food and fitness.  

Yesterday Michelle asked if I would share it publicly on Facebook. I said maybe.  It’s scary being vulnerable. It’s raw and unedited. It’s real. But I share this because I want to start a dialogue. I want to help women put their foot down. To say NO to the social programming of diet mentality that tells us we’re not good enough. To stop negative self-talk.  To speak to themselves the way they would speak to their best friend – or their child. I want women to create a healthy relationship with food and fitness.  To say NO to extreme diets and fads. To be a realistic and healthy example for their children – for their community. To create a ripple effect. 

I post this today because I want to start a ripple. One woman at a time. One conversation at a time. 

Sharing my journey was a deeply personal act – it was a vulnerability victory for me. Vulnerability is my STRENGTH.  Because vulnerability connects us all.  It helps us all relate and feel empathy and compassion for one another and ourselves. And when we have that – we are truly unstoppable.

How could I not respond?  Here is what I posted, and her answer back to me:2016-03-08 10.23.442016-03-08 10.23.52

 

So to all of you women out there on International Women’s Day – be brave, be vulnerable, be real, and love the SKIN you are in.

 

TinaO Your Living Story

TinaO is a Writer, Story Coach, and Host of the TinaOShow, collecting and telling Stories from the Core. She’s the co-owner of The LEAP Learning Lab with Gina Best, and the other half of The Writer’s Compass with Meribeth Deen. She says: Stories are like toddlers, they will follow you around, tugging, hanging off of you until you listen to them.  TinaO is the founder of Live Your Best Story, a weekend retreat of deep listening using writing, storytelling, nature, nourishment, art and connection as a way to listen to the personal story within. The retreat is held in various locations around the world, and is always offered 3x/year in British Columbia where she lives. All are welcome.
As always… let me know your thoughts. They’re always welcome.