The Writer’s Compass – No Chores Allowed- BLOG

April 11, 2018

NO CHORES ALLOWED

I don’t like vacuuming, and I particularly don’t enjoy vacuuming stairs. In order to do it well, I have to change the nozel, plug and unplug the vacuum, position the vacuum itself sideways across each step so it doesn’t fall off as I move up or down, and no matter what I try, I always end up banging or nicking the wall along the way. Ugggggghhhh it’s just too much work. Vacuuming stairs is totally a chore.

I don’t mind doing the dishes. Yes, I have to give up twenty minutes of my life. Yes, I’m often cleaning up someone else’s jam, or scraping macaroni and cheese off someone else’s lunch pot, but it’s not so bad. Doing dishes may be work, but it doesn’t feel like a chore to me.

I don’t really have an opinion about laundry anymore. It’s not work or a chore, it’s a habit. If I grumbled every time I unballed a dirty sock or folded a towel, laundry would be pretty obnoxious for me. I just do it. It’s not work. It’s not a chore. It’s become a practice.

Here’s a Zen Proverb I love because it sums up chores/work/practices and writing beautifully:

Before enlightenment;

chop wood carry water.

After enlightenment;

chop wood carry water.

You’re likely writing something or you wouldn’t be reading this post. You’re probably hoping to find a tip to make your writing process easier, more efficient and maybe even more joyful.

So here it is: Don’t make writing a chore.

That’s it. That’s all. Make writing a choice by building a practice around it. Simply write and keep writing, and as you write, explore new ways to show up to the page again and again and again until the process becomes your practice and it feels like coming home.

Here are some tips to developing your writing practice:

Notice when words come easy for you. Is it when you’re the most awake with more thinking power? Is it when it’s late and there’s less energy to resist? Is it something else?
Try commiting to a small daily word count. Some people do their best work in a sustainable way with a 300-500 daily word count. Did you know Stephen King follows a 3000/day word count and some days he’s done before 11:30am? (BTW… if this makes you groan, you’re in good company. This is not my process).
Try linking writing with a regular activity. E.G. everytime you’re on the bus, write 300 words in your notebook.
Try using writing prompts by finishing a sentence which then becomes a paragraph. Set a timer for three minutes.
Try blocking out one, three to four day weekend per month and create a writing retreat around it. BTW…this is how I write in a non-chore, non-work way. I call myself an immersive writer.

These are just a few ideas to play with and there are oodles more out there. We’ll talk about many of them here.

Here’s the bottomline: Don’t make writing a chore or you’ll be vacumming stairs all day, and who wants to do that? Bleccchhhhh…. not me, and Meribeth and I certainly don’t want that for you.

We want to help you write, finish and deliver your book… repeat.

Here’s to your writing adventure,

Much love,

TinaO

TinaO is a Writer, Story Coach and the other half of The Writer’s Compass with Meribeth Deen. She is the host of the TinaOShow, collecting and telling Stories from the Core and the co-owner with Gina Best of The Leap Learning Lab. The Writer’s Compass encourages writers to get off the beaten path and create impactful stories from the core. We teach: writing isn’t precious, it’s a practice.

Want to join our online writing group? Check out our private Facebook Group: Core Story Writers here.

Core Story Writing Prompt – Where the Wild Things Are – VIDEO

April 20, 2017

Our communication is only ever as powerful as the core we’re willing to plug into. It’s kind of like saying a team is only as strong as it’s weakest link or, the strength of how you start ‘off the block’ often sets up the fire of how you finish. Writing from the core is like being powered straight from the source. It takes courage and muscle and a lot of practice. Using writing prompts can help with that.

Every week in my Core Story Club (which I run with my writing partner Meribeth Deen), we post a weekly writing prompt. Today’s is inspired by Maurice Sendak’s book, Where the Wild Things Are which I read as a child and loved so much so that I had to find it and read it to my three boys as they grew up.

Remember this?

I swear I can still smell the carpet in the library I first heard this in.

Sendak’s book won multiple awards including the 1964 Caldecott Medal, the most Notable Children’s Books of 1940-1970 (ALA), the 1981 Boston Globe-Horn Book Award for Illustration, the 1963 & 1982 Fanfare Honor List (The Horn Book), the Best Illustrated Children’s Books of 1963, 1982 (NYT), and the 1964 Lewis Carroll Shelf Award. It was later made into a stunningly evocative film in 2009 by the celebrated director Spike Jonze. I frickin’ love it.

Today, I’m asking you, if you were in the land of Where the Wild Things Are…

What would you do?

How would you live?

What might you say?

Where might you say it?

When might you care the most?

Who would you let yourself be?

Why would you roar?

Set your timer for 3 minutes and finish this sentence: Where the Wild Things Are I…

Keep going – do not cross out

Keep writing – do not erase

Keep breathing – do not crumple up

What does your story want to tell you today?

Here’s the thing… I never post without doing it myself, so here is mine.

I’m setting the timer now.

Ready… Set… now I Go…

Where the wild things are I write like a demon. Words spill out of me and I don’t hold back. Where the wild things are I can see full colour and I say the things that my heart wants to sing. The truth is, I feel like I live where the wild things are anyway. I kinda am a wild thing. Okay, so I’m not kinda a wild thing, I am one. I’m afraid of that sometimes. Truly. I wear red because it reminds me that I am that. I wear red because it has a beginning, a middle and an end and the world understands it. Okay, so true that people have opinions about women who wear red. Lady in Red. Revlon Red. Red nails. Oh my goodness that makes me think of Cheap Trick and that album cover with the red leather pants. I was only nine years old when that album came out. I had lots of opinions about women and men who wear red. I’m a wild thing and I hold on to my red purse, remember my red dock martins, eat red tomatoes and colour my hair red (well sometimes) when I’m brave enough to let the world know how wild I am. I like primary red. I like that you can’t blend it to make it. It just is. It’s red, wild and wonderful. I’m a wild thing – what can I say?

What do I learn from this?

RED is an expression of my core story even if it’s a secretive part for me. It’s how I share my wild self in a contained kind of way.

How might I use this?

Well… look at my logo. Interesting right?

Here’s another way to use these prompts. Our stories come through us in different ways. How I share my story as a writer is different than how I share as a speaker. I did this writing prompt as a vlog too. I still timed it. I still did the stream of consciousness thingy without filtering.

JOIN IN THE CORE STORY CLUB HERE

TinaO is a Core Story Specialist and a Program Director of PUBLISH with Meribeth Deen for The LEAP Learning Lab. She’s a writer, speaker and the founder of TinaOLife – a hub to Live, Give and Be Your Story, plus the deep listening weekend retreat Live Your Best Story. She’s been in the PR and Marketing world since she could put words together and has been a professional network marketer for over twelve years. She teaches: selling isn’t slimey, marketing isn’t make-believe and writing won’t give you an aneurysm (it’s not hard). You can be yourself in all that you do. In fact, that’s what the world is waiting for.

A Life Coach Walks into the ER… Writing Prompt – BLOG

March 23, 2017

I’m starting a Daily Writing Prompt series because I’ve noticed that so many in business don’t understand the value of what they do. Maybe you’re one of them. You probably think that you’re a consultant or a facilitator or a coach or a real estate agent, accountant… whatever, but you’re not. You’re so much more.

You’re a damn specialist. That’s what you are.

You’re an ER doctor of something awesome.

You have life-saving capabilities.

Okay, I know, you’re not parachuting into war zones with a case load of oxygen tanks behind you and I get that you’re not a front-line health care worker supporting people through a blood transfusion, but you ARE designed to give something radically unique and I’ll say it here… even transformative to your clients. Because if you didn’t, they wouldn’t pay you, they’d pay someone else.

This Writing Prompt is going to help you.

Here’s another one – clients do not choose you because you’re a good listener so please let that go. Lots of people listen well and most think they’re awesome at it. Did you know that every single core story consult I’ve given, the person on the other end of the phone tells me that being a good listener is what makes them special?

It’s not.

Also, clients do not choose you because you’re a great strategist. Toss that one out too. There are a zillion strategists out there who think they’re the bomb. I’m not saying you’re not, I am saying that we need to figure what KIND of success-strategy explosion you set off.

Lots of people are good at strategy. So?

Here’s a biggie: Clients do not come to you because you CARE. Can we please please please stop saying this? Here’s why: EVERY BUSINESS OWNER cares. No one goes into business if they don’t. Come on now, I still have days where a little tired voice in my head pleads with me: “Really Overbury? Really? Can’t we just make cookies and sit on the couch today?”. My answer is NO. You know why?Because I CARE. Every business owner cares. I’m not kidding, and guess what? Every single business owner I talk to tells me this as if it’s THE THING that sets them apart in the marketplace. It’s not.

Ready?

Breathe.

Here comes the truth:

No one cares that you care.

Your clients care about what THEY CARE about and maybe that’s you, but they need to find you first.

Here’s another doozy. Clients do not refer you because you ‘genuinely want them to succeed’. Their mother wants that for them too (well most do…) and she doesn’t get paid for it. Even if you promise them success, that won’t make them refer you either. Success does not create stark raving mad fans (but it does help).

If you think that guaranteeing success is what sets you apart, what do you think other business owners want?

Their clients to kinda succeed?
Maybe succeed?
Do-it-half-way-and-if-you-squint-just-so-you-can-kinda-pretend-they-succeed? No.

Every business owner wants to see their clients succeed. This is NOT what makes you special. This is NOT why people will refer you.

Trust me on this.

Listening, caring, success and results is the baseline. This is where you started, and if you’re not doing these four things you shouldn’t be in business anyway. Okay, I’m being blunt today. I have a reason and here it is:

You are an ER Doctor of something. It’s inside you. It’s part of how you’re designed.

Here’s what I know:

You came into the world with a personality you didn’t have to work for. You are designed to BE something.
Then you experienced a number of life-changing events that created a skill-set so you can DO something.
And somewhere in there you faced a bunch of challenging turning points that shaped your mind-set so you can GIVE something.

It’s one great big set-up and it’s one of the many narratives within your Core Story.

This is what I do.

This is what I’m a specialist at.

I’m an ER Doctor of Core Story Listening. I save people from dying with their words still locked up inside of them.

What are you an ER Doctor of?

Today TinaOLife begins Writing Prompts for Coaches, Consultants and Thought Leaders. Whether you classify yourself in one of these categories or not, come and play.

Here’s How:

Grab a piece of paper and a pen, (yes, please use a pen because it unlocks a very different part of your brain and story), a timer and the day’s prompt and begin.

Tell me what you notice.

What did you learn about the kind of ER Doctor and Business Specialist that you are?

Want my book?

Grab it here.

TinaO is a Core Story Specialist and a Program Director of PUBLISH with Meribeth Deen for The Leap Learning Lab. She’s a writer, speaker and the founder of TinaOLife – a hub to Live, Give and Be Your Story, plus the deep listening weekend retreat Live Your Best Story. She’s been in the PR and Marketing world since she could put words together and has been a professional network marketer for over twelve years. She teaches: selling isn’t slimey, marketing isn’t make-believe and writing won’t give you an aneurysm (it’s not hard). You can be yourself in all that you do. In fact, that’s the world is waiting for.

Six Reasons Why Your Core Story is How We See and Hear you From Space – BLOG

March 22, 2017

Your Book and Message Will be Different.

Because Your Book will Make you Money and not just Cost Buckets of it.

You are smart. You are committed. You’ve done everything you’ve been told to do to ”level up” as they say. You have followed the lead generating system that everyone knows works and looks something like:

Build your network – Grow your audience
Offer a valuable optin – Grow your list
Have an irresistible offer – Convert your leads
Post two blogs per week – Drive traffic to your site
Write your book – Cultivate credibility

Am I right?

You’re doing it all.

You’re ticking off every box.

You’re a freakin’ rock star… but… nothing is happening right?

Or something is happening but it’s not enough and it’s certainly not what you thought.

Here’s why:

STORY.

Your CORE STORY.

and YOU.

When you paid big money for that marketing course, or the program with that proven formula to ‘write your book and be seen as an expert’, no one told you that the single most important ingredient in the whole darn this is your story, specifically your core story.

It’s not about:

a word count or reaching 90,000 words.
a compelling title.
ten key steps or five key steps to a great book (for those who like less as more).

It’s not the steps, it’s the story that lives within them.

It’s not writing your book, it’s telling the story.

Your client and audience only have three resources: time, money and energy. Whether you are a consultant, a coach, a thought leader or a CEO, when you put your book out into the market, you are asking your reader to spend all three of their precious resources with you. Write your book by a formula and I promise you you’ll get your book, but you’ll also lose your credibility and audience unless you write from your core.

Your core story is what connects you to your people. It’s what shakes you into their memory. It creates an imprint that they’re compelled to talk about. It’s what builds your ”tribe” as Seth and Simon say. Your story is the greatest vehicle of trust building that you have. Don’t waste it.

Here are the six parts to creating a Core Story of trust and impact. I’m going to help you because as the story teller you have a blindspot, and that is you. Your story is riddled with them and that’s why you need me and when I write, I need someone else. Our story deserves that level of love and respect.

Here are six ingredients to catapult your message and brand promise into the stratosphere. That’s my benchmark btw. I know we’ve hit gold when I can see and hear you from space. Until we get there, we’re not done.

Six Core Story Ingredients that will Catapult your Message and Promise into the Stratosphere

Your Innate Who
Your Urgent Why
Your Compelling How
Your Impactful Where
Your Profound What
Your Life Changing When

Pretty logical right? Sure, but I promise you, if you attack this list on your own, you’re going to get all clever about it and it will never work. Story is personal even if the details are not, the process always is.

I want your book, your message, your brand’s foundation to rest on these six solid pillars of a Core Story because:

I don’t want your book to collect dust in the closet, sitting in a box of hope.
I don’t want your marketing message to be thought of as shlock.
I don’t want your keynote to be forgotten and considered just one of one hundred other possibilities.
Most importantly, because this one really gets under my skin, I don’t want your book to cost you more money, than you’ll make from it.
I want your story to matter to the world in the same way it matters to you.

Here’s how I’m going to make sure this happens:

Here are TinaO’s Top Ten Core Story Principles to Being Seen and Heard from Space. Sounds silly right? But it’s not. Think local and act global right? It’s time to speak, write, work and share from the core of your story to create a lasting impression that people are willing to invest in. Enough already about making a difference… be the difference with your story.

Click here to receive TinaO’s Top Ten Core Story Principles.

It’s a PLAYBOOK.

I speak directly to you.

There is a workbook too.

I’m silly.

It’s direct.

It’s more than just a read, it’s an experience.

Let’s do this together.

You Matter, and so does your Story.

xxT

TinaO is a Core Story Specialist, a Program Director of PUBLISH with Meribeth Deen for The Leap Learning Lab, she’s a writer, speaker and the founder of TinaOLife – a hub to Live, Give and Be Your Story, plus the deep listening weekend retreat Live Your Best Story. She’s been in the PR and Marketing world since she could put words together and has been a professional network marketer for over twelve years. She teaches: selling isn’t slimey, marketing isn’t make-believe and writing won’t give you an aneurysm (it’s not hard). You can be yourself in all that you do. In fact, that’s the world is waiting for.

Want my book? Get it here.

Meribeth Deen on Patriarchy and Being Robbed of Our Stories – BLOG

March 13, 2017

At a recent event that could best be described as a women’s circle, the women participating were asked two questions in order to kick off the evening’s dialogue. First, introduce yourself not only by your name, but also by the names of your mother and grandmothers. Second, state something you’ve done in your life that you feel proud of – in particular, what you’ve done to “fight the patriarchy” (those were not the words, but that was the jist of what was being asked.

I honestly felt stumped on both counts. Now partly that has to do with the fact that I absolutely freeze in any situation where I’m put on the spot and am asked to talk about myself (helloooo…. job interviews). Also, I couldn’t even name my paternal grandmother. Never mind the fact that I never met her… I should at least know her name. I should know more than the fact that she had A WHOLE BUNCH of kids and even adopted one or two, and that she was both short and stubborn. Really though I don’t know much more about my maternal grandmother even though she lived until I was 21 and yes I did know her name, oh it still shameful how little I know about her life.

My grandfathers, on the other hand, their stories shine. Stories of heroics, intelligence, ingenuity, determination and yes, a few less praiseworthy traits as well – but still, with all of those, stories, the memory of these men evoke a much more complete picture of the lives they lived.

It’s a great assignment, digging up the details of these women’s lives. And I am sure that by taking it on, so many of us women could end up revealing stories that would blow us away. Shedding light on the lives of women whose voices were so diminished compared to ours, we could start to see that we come from a long line of heroes.

We’ve been robbed of their stories, and we can reclaim them.

From their lack of stories, we can also begin to understand the value of our own stories. Our predecessors have fought hard for so many rights we now take for granted, and having a voice and the power to make our stories heard is one of them.

Which brings me to the second question, you know, the fighting patriarchy one. It’s been really hard for me – putting myself, my thoughts, out there publicly; and I am growing into the role. But now I realize, speaking up and trying to be heard and listened to, well that’s simply a woman’s responsibility.

Our stories matter. Your story matters. Take the leap and write it, your granddaughters will thank you.

If you are ready to position yourself as an expert, become a unique voice for your industry and build a residual income, it’s time to write your book so you can grow your audience, reach new markets, and fill your calendar with speaking gigs. It’s time for impact. It’s not about writing a story, it’s about writing yours. Welcome to PUBLISH, a three phase book writing program that brings your story from concept to publish ready.

**Every Wednesday we host a Publish Ready Master Session at 3pm (pacific time). We hope you’ll join us on any of these following days:**

March 15, 22, 29 and April 5

CLICK HERE to Register for Wednesday’s 3pm PST PUBLISH Master Session (to April 5th)

Meribeth Deen is a Journalist and a Story Producer. She’s a program director of PUBLISH on The Leap Learning Lab. She’s produced radio documentaries all over the world and brought the stories of whistle-blowers at Guantanamo Bay to the screen. She goes to where the truth lives. She’s kind, process oriented and believes that when writing, you need to get lost in order to find the point.

Meribeth Deen on Why your Book Matters – BLOG

February 22, 2017

Your book. Yes, the one that’s you’re writing in your head. The one that you tell your confidantes about, the one that you know will be great, if you ever get around to writing it.

There are so many reasons not to: a lack of time, not being sure of how to actually take the first steps, you’re insecurity about the way the words you put on the page sound… and then of course, the best excuse of all: you question, do books even matter these days anyway? This is the question I want to answer right now, and the answer is YES, they do matter. And yes, YOUR book matters.

Writing it, is your chance to state your case across party lines, across time, space, race and sex.

Your book is an opportunity to connect, to make an impact. You don’t know who you’ll make an impact with, and you don’t know what the impact will be (although some educated guessing can help in the writing of your marketing plan).

But when you write with integrity, you can move forward with a “strong spine and open heart” to field whatever questions, conversations and criticisms may come your way.

Your book, the one that you know will be great, if you ever get around to writing it.

Your book is an opportunity for growth – you don’t have to be right, and someday you may look back and think how very wrong you were, but you wrote with honesty and so you will honestly own up to having moved on to a new perspective. The book will simply be a record of who you were when you wrote it, and that’s a good thing. It will give you something to measure yourself against.

Why write a book? Because it won’t get lost in the digital ether, like this blog post.

See you in PUBLISH. Read on to find out how you can be on the VIP list to have first in line access for this exclusive program.

Meribeth

If you are a Canadian woman entrepreneur, leader, innovator, millennial or your business offers services to women in Canada we invite you to find out more about LEAP Learning Lab.We are a team of 10 fabulous Canadian women creating opportunities for other Canadian women to accelerate their success and their results across multiple disciplines. We also offer corporate learning solutions for businesses committed to the development of their women leaders.

We are looking for fabulous Canadian women to learn, live and lead with us. Collectively, through learning, we will make each other better humans.

Find out how this fabulous group of Canadian women can help you accelerate your results. CLICK HERE TO JOIN OUR VIP LIST for our upcoming VIP Summit Feb 28th and/or March 1st.

Meribeth Deen is a Journalist and a Story Producer. She’s produced radio documentaries all over the world and brought the stories of whistle-blowers at Guantanamo Bay to the screen. She goes to where the truth lives. She’s kind, process oriented and believes that when writing, you need to get lost in order to find the point.

We Learn from our Story – BLOG

February 21, 2017

Our story is a personal invitation to learn. It’s not our curse nor our blessing. It’s not our label or paradigm or racket or reason to blame or run or justify. It’s not our grandeur or accomplishment or title or goals. Story just is, and it never ends, while we have breath in our body, blood in our veins and synapses firing between our ears, it is our story that invites us to keep on learning. Why? Because an experience of living doesn’t happen in what we know, it’s in the minute after minute of discovery, and it’s vital to our happiness.

Curiosity didn’t kill the cat, comparison did. You know what happens when we stop learning? We start believing that we know stuff and God help us when that happens because that’s how comparison creeps in. You’ll notice when you start using position statements like: I’m right, they’re wrong. She’s good enough, I’m not. They can do it, I can’t. Why me? Why her? We begin to use words like always and never, as in…I always have to… or I never get to… as if there’s another option out there that we’re not allowed to have.

Comparison killed the cat.

The remedy? Operate in the learning and living zone. Let your story unfold. Be curious. Can we have knowledge? Yes of course it’s just that we mustn’t stop there. We must develop skills and gain wisdom, be guided by our experiences, but the very second we stop learning it’s as if we’re saying I’ve had enough of my story thanks. That’s enough learning for me.

Really?

How about this: what makes an unbelievable book? Some fictional character or person’s real life experience takes us on a roller-coaster ride of happenings that move, inspire or transform us. Most importantly, it’s a journey that we can see ourselves in. Memorable books reflect our human experience and that’s why a killer book compels us to turn the page. We are addicted to learning. We have an insatiable desire to answer the question: What next? Think about your morning routine. When your feet hit the floor and you raise your first cuppa, doesn’t the little voice in your head ask you that very question? Isn’t that why you move forward? What’s next?

That is the juju of our story. That’s what learning is.

We say: Teach me. What else is there? I want to know. I’m ready. More please. I want to be better at this. I want to try something new. I want to expand, to stretch, to lift, to enjoy, to be thrilled, to be moved. I am a life-long learner.

Life IS learning.

In today’s seemingly chaotic world governed by technology, at-capacity-thresholds and relentless change, those of us who embrace life by continuing to sit in the learning seat, (dare I say it?) will be HAPPIER than those who don’t (there I said it) because it takes more energy to hang on than it does to let go and learn.

It takes more energy to hang on than it does to let go and learn.

If you’re in business, and you don’t get story, you’re in trouble because today’s marketing is steeped in it. If you’re still selling pain instead of freedom your days are numbered because today’s consumers are done with adrenaline based marketing. Fear hurts more now because it’s difficult to get away from. If you have a website (and come on now, you must if you’re in business) and you don’t have a book: you are totally missing it. Today we are story based. That is how we learn. That is what we respect and that is what we are yearning for.

Enough with telling me what you know.

Teach me what I want to know instead.

I’m a program director with The Leap Learning Lab and along with Meribeth Deen, the two of us lead a program called PUBLISH supporting the stories of Canadian women from concept to publish ready. And while I can tell you about the tangible benefits of writing your book with us, it’s not the ‘how to’ stuff like this that you’ll take with you once you’re done.

HOW TO:

craft a title that connects to your core.
conduct a research based interview.
link one chapter to the next so your reader is compelled to turn the page.
bring the vibrancy of your inner story up and out to live on the page.
magnify your voice to cut through the noise of other books in your genre.
etc… etc… etc…

Those are just some of the writing take-aways of PUBLISH, but what about the intangibles? Because this is where life as a committed learner enters the picture. This is where we follow, and yes possibly even run along our path to happiness.

TAKE AWAYS:

Honouring the roots of where you’ve been so that your wisdom is a gift.
Connecting to the core of your why to make sense of why any of it matters.
Trusting the story that wants to tell you instead of feeling the pressure of having to drive it all the time.
Allowing a relationship with your creative side to lighten your load a bit more.
Developing a greater sense of confidence in who you are, where you come from and your place in the world.
Finding deeper meaning in all of it.

How do you put that into a curriculum? You can’t because it’s a bi-product of showing up and doing the work whatever that may be. In PUBLISH it’s about getting your book written. In Live Your Best Story (a retreat I lead), it’s about listening so as to lead your life. Whatever it is, take it on as the life-long learner that you are designed to be.

Happiness is connected to our sense of belonging, to understanding what brings us peace, and to doing life within the design of who we truly are. None of us get there by standing on a mountain of what we know. All of us will get there when we’re committed to living by learning.

Our story is an invitation to learn and as we do, we invite more happiness in to our life.

xxT

If you are a Canadian woman entrepreneur, leader, innovator, millennial or your business offers services to women in Canada we invite you to find out more about LEAP Learning Lab.

We are a team of 10 fabulous Canadian women creating opportunities for other Canadian women to accelerate their success and their results across multiple disciplines. We also offer corporate learning solutions for businesses committed to the development of their women leaders.

We are looking for fabulous Canadian women to learn, live and lead with us. Collectively, through learning, we will make each other better humans.

Want you FREE COPY of TinaO’s Core Story Playbook? Click here.

_______________________________________________

Here’s where you can find out more about Tina’s upcoming retreat: Live Your Best Story. Here’s where you can find out more about PUBLISH and become a VIP in the Leap Learning Lab.

Identifying Your Core Story – an Excerpt – BLOG

December 29, 2016

Here’s an excerpt from the first draft of Chapter One of You Matter – Identifying your Core Story that will be complete by December 31st. Follow along if it speaks to you. Big love to Meribeth Deen for being my Story Doula through this process. She said to me once a few months ago: ‘I can see that my challenge with you is going to be when and how to reign you in to a specific focus.’ She was right. But as is true with all my core story work, the focus found me and all I had to do was follow the thread.

Here is an excerpt for you:

I begin every Core Story client with a complimentary inquiry call and while this may shift as my work carries on, here’s why I do it this way: I am creating the best place I know how to let the story tell us and not the other way around. It follows the same belief that we can never run faster than our story and by making the call free, both you and I can step into the ring of ‘what have I got to lose?’ and that’s where permission begins. It’s not a flippant, what have I got to lose? although it can start out that way, usually and very quickly with that kind of freedom between us, I can establish a sense of ‘it’s just you and me here’ so that the story that wants to be known by you can feel safe enough to emerge.

Is my time valuable? Yes, no more than yours. Is my experience worthy of payment, yes, no more than yours. Do I deserve to be paid for my work? Yes, and at this stage of our relationship, only if it’s of value to you. If we decide to move forward together we’re going to be doing some intimate work so we need to choose each other. I like to think of it like dating. Imagine if we charged for that. What would that do to our connectivity? What I’m saying is, we have to authentically decide for it to be real. We don’t kiss the guy or girl at the end of the first date simply because we’re supposed to, or because it’s deserved, we kiss them because we want to, because the desire to be together emerges out of us.

One of my favourite moments with my now husband happened at the end of our second date. We had gone to the movies or something (I totally don’t remember the details), and we both knew that the next day he was going on tour and wouldn’t be back for a week. He walked me up to my door and I let him inside. We had an awkward hug and a peck on the cheek followed by stilted small talk about when he’d be back and how he’d call me when he returned and then I let him out and closed the door. I took a few confused steps down my hallway towards the living room when I heard a gentle knock, and I smiled. I didn’t even have a thought yet, but I somehow knew this was honest. This felt true. I curiously walked back, turned the deadbolt and opened the door. He looked at me, hesitating briefly and trembling just a little and said “If I went on tour without kissing you, and I mean really kissing you I’d have to kick my own ass.” With that he planted one on me and left. His desire to kiss me emerged out of him. It behooved him not to leave without a real, risky, whole-hearted kiss. He could not run faster than the story of that kiss. As for me, I felt confused when he left the first time because I didn’t get it, but I didn’t know what the it was that I didn’t get yet. It wasn’t logical. It wasn’t formulaic. It just didn’t feel right, him leaving like that. It wasn’t until he knocked the second time that I kind of understood, and then when he kissed me, I fell, and hard. That was the moment of our connection. Neither one of us needed to take charge of the end of the date, we simply had to follow the thread of the story and then show up and live it out fully.

And that’s why I don’t charge for my inquiry call, I am creating space for what is real to emerge so that the truth can happen without our own alpha-agendas of how things should be or my own story of self-worth getting in the way.

Don’t worry, I won’t be kissing you, but I may knock twice.

By December 31st 2016 the first draft of this book will be done. If you’d like a complimentary digital copy of TinaO’s Identifying your Core Story, pop your name in here and we’ll be sure to send it to you once it’s complete early 2017.

As well, if you are a Canadian woman with a story to tell and would like to be considered for PUBLISH, a book writing program launching in mid January 2017 through powHERhouse Media Group, you may want to consider becoming a Woman we Celebrate so TinaO and Meribeth Deen can support you to get your book written this year.

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TinaO is a Core Story Specialist, a writer, speaker and the founder of TinaOLife – a hub for all things worth living for, and the workshop Live Your Best Story. She’s also a professional network marketer with a decade in the industry and she teaches: selling isn’t slimey and marketing isn’t make-believe. You can be yourself and be successful in Direct Sales.

Identifying your Core Story – BLOG

December 29, 2016

By December 31st the first draft of You Matter – Identifying your Core Story will be complete. You can follow along as I share some sneak peeks with you until then. Big thanks to Meribeth Deen for being my Story Doula as I give birth to this word-baby. Did I just say that? Word-baby. Oh boy. I said it again.

We live our life unconsciously as stories with excited beginnings, doubtful mid-way points and then panicked or impending endings. We feel the timing of stories. We are captivated by the unknown because we expect an inevitable resolution. We control our lives to avoid the terror of unnecessary surprises. We get story and because the construct of beginning, middle, end is so ingrained into us, we woe-fully take on the dangerous pretense of being able to write our own story, as if we ultimately can. I’m here to tell you that while that’s possible, yes you can pick up the pen and write your own story, set your own course, and create the life you’ve dreamed of (as the inspirational wall art we buy never stops reminding us), this one-sided alpha position approach to living, while it may bring you short-term confidence, perceived control and seemingly peaceful order, it comes at a high price and that usually means your life, figuratively and sometimes even literally.

Yes you know where you’re going

Yes you may have the means to get there

Yes you may even have full confidence that you can ‘make it happen’

Until one day, you don’t, or unspeakably you can’t, or you simply won’t, and you don’t know why. It’s as if you can’t quite put your finger on it, you just know you can’t do this, whatever this is, anymore.

As well, if you are a Canadian woman with a story to tell and would like to be considered for PUBLISH, a book writing program through powHERhouse Media Group, you may want to consider becoming a Woman we Celebrate so TinaO and Meribeth Deen can support you to get your book written this year.

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